April 2, 2012. Today, I put Patrick deWitt’s The Sisters Brothers on hold at the library. There are 279 circulating copies and 1408 holds. How long will it take for this book to come to me? Let’s start the illegal, off-track betting now.

Options:

1) April 2, 2013.

2) By the time The Sisters Brothers gets to you, Colleen, books won’t even be printed on paper anymore.

3) Never: the book clubs desperate to read this novel will have successfully put a hit out on you long before you’re even close to the top of this list.